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Aaron’s Story: Back in the world again

Aaron - allotment volunteer

I have struggled with my mental health for the majority of my life. I lost a good part of my late teens and most of my twenties to mental ill-health; depression, anxiety, agoraphobia, loneliness and social isolation, trauma, addiction, suicidal ideation. I just thought this was it. This is going to be my life, for the rest of my life.

After my father passed away in 2018 – I moved and stayed away from Manchester for a few years. In 2021, and not really by choice, I ended up moving back. I quickly found myself isolated, drinking again, lacking purpose and really struggling with my mental health. Midway through 2022, it all got too much, I had a pretty serious mental health breakdown. I had to leave work and then spent the next four of five months terrified of the world, hiding away in the house, just trying to hold on. I’d been here before, but I was tired, close to giving up. Fortunately, I had an amazing partner at the time who really helped keep me afloat.

I knew that I had to do something to change my situation and start getting better. I went on Manchester Mind’s website, initially looking for resources that could help me, I then saw that there was a volunteering vacancy at the allotment. It took me a little time to muster up the courage, but eventually I decided to apply for it and went to meet both Dionne and Carolyn at the allotment (in typical Manchester fashion – it was absolutely pouring down!) Despite the weather, I knew straight away this would be a good thing for me.

Within a month or two, the allotment reopened for spring and I began attending sessions every Monday. Ah, I was back in the world again.

It’s our safe space, the best way to start a week, outdoors, in nature, using your hands and surrounded by a community of supportive and empathetic people. I’ve met some wonderful people at the allotment and felt comfortable enough to express myself and open up about things I had bottled up for years.

A couple of day trips really stand out as highlights of last year – one to Castlefield Viaduct and another one to RHS Bridgewater (on an untypically glorious Manchester day) – both gave me such a massive boost and after so many years of loneliness, I felt like I was part of something again. The first six months of 2023 – Manchester Mind and the allotment played a huge role in supporting me back into functionality and better health. I started to care about me again, I felt more valued and began building confidence, felt connected to people and the city again and ultimately began to really start putting my life together and getting the support I needed.

Now midway through 2024 – my life looks very different from two years ago. No longer am I just surviving, but thriving. I began a new career in the charity sector which is going well, I have for the first time in my life accessed mental health support and stuck with it – six plus months of therapy has helped me considerably – I’m finally starting to heal. I’m also back playing football, re-built relationships with family and friends and started some new ones too. In October, I’m even climbing Kilimanjaro!

The allotment has played an important part in shaping this new, positive chapter of my life – to the extent – I organised for my whole workplace to come down and spend an afternoon volunteering there. Colleagues at work now understood why I feel that attending the allotment on a Monday is an important part of my mental health recovery. I will forever be grateful to Manchester Mind and particularly Dionne and Carolyn for everything they do. I have a life now, taking that first step to volunteer at the allotment was the hardest, but its undoubtedly led me to somewhere good.

I hope whoever reads this, just know you aren’t alone, there is support out there and there are amazing organisations and people who can and want to help. It’s not always easy to see when you are really struggling, but things can and will get better.

Thanks for reading.

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